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| ©Darrell Wyatt |
We had a ward fast on Sunday for some people in our neighborhood who are having some pretty serious health problems. My husband and I have never been very good at making the kids fast with us, but since one of the people that we were fasting for is the mother of their very good friend, we decided that this would be as good a day as any to start.
We started off well. We first discussed why we were fasting, and then we talked about the appropriate way to act while we're fasting. Then we said a prayer to officially start the fast. And it was all downhill from there. My youngest son remembered that he had learned that you don't have to fast until you've been baptized, and promptly announced that he was going to go eat a sandwich. My autistic son went straight from the prayer into the kitchen and got himself a big drink - "I thought we only couldn't eat or drink while we were at church." My youngest daughter decided that she might die any second from starvation (even though there are many Sundays that we race out the door to church without having time to eat) and started crying. My middle daughter lasted about an hour before she declared that she "just can't do it anymore" and cut herself some bread. Since I had decided before we started the fast that I wasn't going to let my control issues ruin the day, I told her that I was disappointed, but that it was her choice.
So, by the time we got to church, five of us were still fasting, including the youngest girl who was sure she was going to die. She's very competitive, and I think that it sort of became a challenge for her once she saw the other kids dropping out like flies. She was going to win this thing. My oldest son (the one with autism), had done very well after the drink incident, until he got thrown out of his routine by being asked to pass the Sacrament. Usually this is done by the 12 and 13 year old boys, but there weren't enough there by the time Sacrament Meeting was about to start. A sweet little deacon came over and asked my son to help and was met with a loud "You have got to be kidding me" and darts being shot from my son's eyes. This cute, innocent little guy didn't know how to react. Since we have seen what happens if he continues down the road he was headed, my husband escorted my son out of the chapel while I helped the stunned deacon find another older boy who could help. As the sacrament ended, my husband and son walked back into the chapel. There was an obvious "Dad took me home and fed me so now I'll be fine for the rest of the day" look on his face. It was actually a little bit comical. Now we were down to four.
We made it through the three hour block, with only a handful of "I need to go home and eat right now" comments, and came home where we met in the living room to say a prayer to break the fast. I almost laughed aloud when I looked over to see my youngest daughter with a piece of bread in her hand. I think she was still finishing the word "Amen" when she all but shoved the whole thing in her mouth.
This being really our first experience as a family fasting, I was ready to throw in the towel and go back to just fasting by myself. That was a lot of effort! Until I read this morning:
Nevertheless they did fast and pray oft, and did wax stronger and stronger in their humility, and firmer and firmer in the faith of Christ, unto the filling their souls with joy and consolation, yea even to the purifying and the sanctification of their hearts, which sanctification cometh because of their yielding their hearts unto God. (Helaman 3:35)
That's just what I needed to hear. If I don't teach my kids the importance of fasting, I am, in a sense, denying them the blessings that come along with it - humility and faith and joy and a pure heart - all the things that any parent wishes for their child. So, as hard as it was and will be (and I know it will get easier with time), every month we'll do it again. We are now a fasting family.
Never give up. You will be stronger for this. You can't force them but you can definitely encourage them to fast with you. Emily fasts for one meal and the rest of us fast the two meals of course. When Emily turns 12 she will fast the two meals. I hope the attitude is better by then. :)
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