Fat IS Where It's At

Mom's Snickerdoodles                                             ©Darrell Wyatt

I love food.  I always say that I'm an emotional eater.  I eat when I'm sad.  I eat when I'm happy.  I eat when I'm lonely.  I eat when I'm nervous or stressed or excited.  I eat when I'm anxious.  I eat when I feel like celebrating or when I feel like crying.  If there's an emotion, I can link it to food.  When I'm having a particularly stressful day, I spend a lot of my time going from the fridge to the pantry and back to the fridge again, hoping that something magically appeared since the last time I was there.  I'm sure if I were to have a psychiatrist (or is it psychologist?  I never can remember the difference) pick me apart, he or she would say that I'm trying to use food as a band-aid to fix my troubles.  In reality, I think I'm using it as some sort of anesthetic.  I'm trying to become numb to the problem of the day.  I think I've even tried to put myself in a food coma a couple of times to escape.

Turns out, I've been going about it all the wrong way.  And I knew that, but this morning's reading really helped to hammer it home.

Come, my brethren, every one that thirsteth, come ye to the waters; and he that hath no money, come buy and eat; yea come buy wine and milk without money and without price.

Now, of course Jacob was not talking about literal money or wine or milk or food.  He was saying that whatever we're looking for to be happy can be found by looking to Jesus Christ.  

Wherefore, do not spend money for that which is of no worth, nor your labor for that which cannot satisfy...

I have had friends who were really not happy.  They were trying, but not ever really succeeding, to find something - anything - to feel satisfied.  They would buy toys, big and small, and new vehicles.  They would buy fancy appliances or a bigger television set.  They would remodel their homes, over and over.  But still, they would not be satisfied.  There were deeper problems in all of their lives, whether they were marital problems or financial struggles.  And while all the stuff and the remodeling would make them forget these things temporarily, the struggles would always come back - many times multiplied.

I guess it's kind of the same way with me and food.  Those 7Eleven nachos that I could almost die for don't make my money troubles disappear.  That heavenly cheesecake obviously won't make my kids miraculously start listening to me, and no amount of delicious buttery popcorn will cure my self-esteem issues.

...Hearken diligently unto me, and remember the words which I have spoken; and come unto the Holy One of Israel, and feast upon that which perisheth not, neither can be corrupted, and let your soul delight in fatness.

And all this time, I've been fattening up the wrong thing!  I have been feeding my body instead of my soul.  And oh, how it shows.  I need to do much, much better at turning to the Lord with my problems, and even my excitement.  He is always there for me.  He shares in my sadness.  He shares in my happiness.  He shares in my misery and my loneliness and my anxiety.  He also shares in my joy and my pleasure.  

My new goal is to become the fattest I can be - in the right place.  I will work hard at fattening my soul.  Reading my scriptures is a good start, but turning my troubles over to the Lord and thanking him often for my blessings will move me even closer.

Click here to read what I read today!