Baby Steps

Last night, my husband and I left to run errands and do a little bit of Christmas shopping.  It was so nice to be able to just get out and relax.  It almost made me forget what it used to be like when I'd have to go shopping with all the kids.  Almost.  Those were definitely the times that try men's souls.  I would, out of either bravery or sheer stupidity, think that whatever I needed at the store just couldn't wait until my husband got home from work to stay with the kids, and we would load up and venture out.  I usually regretted it before we even arrived at the store, what with all the "MO-OOOM!  He's touching me!" and "She's breathing my air!" comments coming from the back of the van.  Once we arrived at the store, they would transform from pretty normal, well-adjusted kids, into little beggars.  My ears would ring with cries of "Please, mom?  Can I have this?  If you buy this for me, I'll never ask for another thing in my WHOLE life."  After awhile, our trips to the store would include a brief lecture in the parking lot before seatbelts could come off.  "No, you can't have anything, so don't ask.  No running.  No hitting.  No yelling.  Stay right next to the cart - no wandering off.  If one person asks me if they can have something, we will come straight back out to this car and go home with nothing.  Don't test me." So, they stopped asking.  But they didn't stop testing.  "Mom, isn't this (insert name of candy or toy or hair pretty or clothing item here) so great???  I wonder what it would be like to have one."  My favorite trick, though (and they all still use it), is when one of the kids would say something like, "Look at this!  I'm pretty sure that Kim would love it.  Maybe we should just buy it for her and if she doesn't like it, I could have it."  Professional con artists, I've raised.

Needless to say, when my oldest daughter got old enough that we could leave her home with the younger kids, we jumped at the chance.  As much as we wanted to, though, we didn't start out with an all-day excursion.  I think the first time I left her in charge, I went to the convenience store around the corner.  I was gone for no more than ten or fifteen minutes.  As worried as I was that a fireball would somehow fall from the sky and consume my house and all my children within that time period, it was a little freeing to be out on my own in the middle of the day.  So I kept doing it.  I would leave for for a little bit longer each time.  Baby steps.  When I finally realized that she could handle it and that the earth wasn't going to open up under my house and swallow them up if I left for an hour or two, I could really enjoy my alone time.  Soon, the time at which I would decide to come home was decided upon only when the other customers at the store got tired of my cell phone ringing.  "Everything is going great.  When are you coming home?  Are you almost here?  What's for dinner?  I forgot what I was going to say.  I love you."  Now, after a few years, the kids are all pretty independent, and because of that, so am I.  I can pretty much leave whenever I need or want to, without much worry.  And it is so nice.

As I was reading this morning, I stumbled upon some versus that were similar in theory to my experiences with the kids.

And when they shall have received this, which is expedient that they should have first, to try their faith, and if it shall so be that they shall believe these things then shall the greater things be made manifest unto them.

Behold, I was about to write them, all which were engraven upon the plates of Nephi, but the Lord forbade it, saying:  I will try the faith of my people. (3 Nephi 26: 9, 11)

I'm not quite sure what these "greater things" are that have been withheld from the Book of Mormon, but I completely understand the reasoning behind withholding them.  Baby steps.  There are many, many people who don't believe that the Book of Mormon is the word of God.  He is teaching us, just as Isaiah foretold, "precept upon precept...line upon line; here a little, and there a little"(Isaiah 28:10).  Just as I gave my daughter more and more responsibility, little by little, as she showed she was capable, the Lord will give us more according to our faith and willingness to accept what small amount we have been given.  I'm sure that he'd love to just give it all to us right now, but he knows that we need to be completely ready.  Again, an example of a wise and omnipotent Father.  I don't know if I will live to see the "greater things" revealed, but I hope to prove to God my worthiness to someday receive them.  For now, I'll just keep taking those baby steps.

Click here to read what I read today: 3 Nephi 25

Click here to read what I read today: 3 Nephi 26

Click here to read what I read today: 3 Nephi 27